Over the last couple weeks I have consciously shared aspects of my life that, while they don’t make me look shiny and impressive, are very much a part of my story.
Every time I do, I cringe a little. Because even though I know everybody experiences fear, uncertainty and doubt (FUD), and everybody screws up, there’s a part of me that rails against admitting to the world at large that I do. It’s supremely uncomfortable.
So why am I doing it? In a word, service. I deeply, deeply believe that not owning the fullness of my human experience – my superhero genius AND my FUDitude – is a disservice to all of you out there whose lives I feel called to touch.
By allowing myself to be vulnerable and acknowledging that, while I feel blessed with some fabulous gifts and abilities, I don’t have it all together, I hope I can add in some small way to help people:
- Be more willing to be authentic and real themselves.
- Feel less of an inclination to judge themselves harshly for what is an inevitable part of the human experience.
- Recognize that just because they’re feeling FUD or making mistakes doesn’t mean they don’t have what it takes.
FUD: An objective perspective
In nearly thirteen years of coaching focused on helping people create careers and lives that energize them, I have had a front row seat on people’s FUD. As a result, I know that it’s present in places you would never guess. I know that, however polished and confident a person may appear, somewhere below the surface FUD is almost guaranteed to be lurking.
And when people can’t admit that, when people judge themselves as somehow broken because they are experiencing what every other person out there experiences in some way behind the scenes, it represses their potential.
One way to lighten that load is normalizing it. One of the benefits of my work is I get a more accurate look at what is really going on in people’s lives. They’re honest with me. And it is never exclusively the superhero persona we all want others to see.
I can’t tell you how many times I have shared with a client the objective perspective my coaching conversations has given me on this and gotten a flood of relief? “Really? I’m not the only one?”
The irony is that we feel so isolated because we hide something that is one of the most common aspects of the human experience. We’re all gloriously imperfect, and nobody wants to admit it.
Am I a superhero? Absolutely! I feel very blessed by my gifts and abilities. And I’m really good at what I do. AND at times I’m also a quivering pile of FUD.
Welcome to the human experience. Want to come out and play?
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