Are you cheating yourself of your potential? If you are, you’re in good company. Most of us are, to some degree.
One of the most insidious ways we get in our own way is the incessant temptation to try to be somebody else. So many people show up in life based on their perception of who and how they need to be in order to succeed, be accepted, etc., and it has little or nothing to do with their authentic shine.
It’s one of the big reasons people end up coming to my for my Passion Catalyst coaching – their career has become this never-ending saga of getting up in the morning and heading off for another day of being who they’re not. (If that feels a little too familiar, here’s an article with some nuts-and-bolts ideas for what to do about it.)
This tendency came up in a conversation with a friend the other day who was feeling the draw of putting on her “conventional mask” when her real gifts and magic have always flowed from her non-conventional (and incredibly effective) authentic persona.
As we talked, this picture came to mind (look upon my artistic mastery in awe!).
The picture wasn’t just about my friend. It describes the sweet spot we all have, that authentic peak where we are bringing our truest gifts and abilities to the world in a way that both energizes us and optimizes our performance.
Any step away from center, from our authentic peak, takes us to a lower level. We don’t feel as good, we don’t leverage our natural gifts as fully, and we don’t perform as well (or we have to put more energy into achieving that same level of performance, which creates an energy drain).
Our potential is at its highest when we’re occupying the peak. Any attempt to “be someone else,” to wear a mask and play a role that’s not natural for us leads us down the hill.
How we step off our personal peak position
How do people step away from that peak position? Things like:
- Pursuing a career they don’t love because it looks “successful”
- Making choices based on others’ expectations
- Presenting themselves as who they think they “should” be
- Compromising their values to satisfy someone else
- Using an externally created definition of success to make their decisions
Putting the picture to work in your life
Real life is more complicated than the simplicity of the picture, of course. There are multiple ways we can step off the peak in different areas of our life. And there are times when we have to compromise, optimizing the situation rather than maximizing.
But the picture gives you a really simple way to think about what’s going on in your life. It gives you a way to ask a bottom line yes or no question. There’s only one spot that occupies that peak position, and that is the one that allows you to be authentically you.
So you can ask, “Am I standing on my peak (in my choice of work, in this relationship, in how I show up with people, etc.), or have I stepped down the mountain?”
If you’re not on your peak, you can follow that question up with, “What would standing on my peak look like here? What has led me downhill from the peak? What steps can I take to move back up?”
It’s unrealistic to expect that you’ll be all peak, all the time. But by keeping that peak position in your awareness, you can both make decisions that will keep you there and avoid steps that will lead you down the mountain.
–
Join the Ripple Revolution TM
- Subscribe to the Ripple Revolution Podcast feed.
- Subscribe to Ripple Revolution Blog feed.
- Sign up for the Ripple Revolution e-mail newsletter.
Brought to you by Curt Rosengren, Passion Catalyst TM
Time for a career change? Start with The Occupational Adventure Guide