In my Passion Catalyst coaching work, there’s a frequent conversation I have that goes something like this…
Client: Everybody else seems to know what they want to do in their career, and I’m just lost. I’m stuck. Gawd, I suck. There must be something wrong with me.
Me: Don’t worry. Everyone else is clueless too.
OK, so that’s a really abbreviated version of the conversation, but it’s the basic gist of it.
If there’s one thing I have learned over the last dozen years of helping people energize their careers (and their lives), it’s that the facade of “I’ve got it all together” doesn’t run very deep for most people. Underneath is a litany of uncertainty, doubts, and fears.
Take people’s careers, for example. When you look around, it’s easy to think that most of the people around you feel like they’re on the right path. And yet statistically, studies have shown year after year that over 50% of employees are dissatisfied with their jobs! And another 30+ percent are only “satisfied – as in, “It’s better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.” Only 15 percent or so really love what they do.
Not exactly in line with “everyone else seems to know where they’re going,” is it?
Just because people don’t wear a flashing neon sign advertising their uncertainty and dissatisfaction doesn’t mean it’s not there. So next time you feel compelled to compare yourself to how together other people seem to have it, just remember, “Everyone else is clueless too.”
It might not be in the exact same way you’re clueless. They might not have the same fears you have. They might have clarity where you feel uncertainty. But somewhere in their lives, in some way, I can just about guarantee that they’re experiencing their own version of doubt and insecurity.
If you use other people as a measuring stick for assessing how you’re doing in your life, you will always be able to come up short. Why? There’s a quote I love from pastor and author Steven Furtick that somes it up brilliantly:
“One reason we struggle with insecurity: we’re comparing our behind the scenes to everyone else’s highlight reel.”
So remember, when you fall short in your comparisons, you’re only seeing the highlight reel. Let go of how other people are doing, and focus on your next step.
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Brought to you by Curt Rosengren, Passion Catalyst TM
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